On Fables and Myths

I've always admired my father. There have definitely been points in my life when I have hated him, every child goes through this. You feel your parents have wronged you for various reasons... but my father has this one quality which I have never been able to de-fable. He's fearless. He's truly fearless. He's conquered the most ridiculous odds purely on his ability to face anything that has come up against him, and not backdown. 

Growing up I never looked up to superheroes, because my father was one in my eyes.  When I was 10 I went for a walk with my father. This was 1987 and California didn't have any rules against walking your dog without a leash. As we passed by this house three or four dogs came charging at us. I was terrified of dogs, especially the ones that bark and charge at you. I was frozen in fear, I could not move. I was watching those dogs, baring their teeth, come closer and closer. From the corner of my eye, I noticed my father running towards the dogs. Between us and the dogs there was a stick lying on the ground... he was amazingly running towards the stick. He picked it up and started warding the dogs away from us. At one point there were 4 dogs jumping all over him.  I will never forget his face, he wasn't scared. Superheroes were nothing compared to him.

I think about that moment from time to time. The fact that he saw the stick in this situation is what puzzled me the most, but there were other factors that I think about. See the odds that he would get to the stick before the dogs was slim... too slim. Even if he got the stick, did he really think he could fight off four huge dogs with one stick? There is a "fight or flight" mechanism built into each of us. In that situation I know for me it was flight... no question. For my father it was fight. It is always fight with him. He has never once backed down from a challenge. I notice it even today in his Alzheimers. I go for a walk with my father once a week. I try to jog his memory and make him laugh as much as I can. I will always try to get him to sing his favorite Dev Anand songs. Today I challenged him with "I bet I know more songs than you do." He took on the challenge. He doesn't remember any of the songs from the movies, so he made up songs. He made up a new song for every film song I sang. At the end I had to let him win, because I just memorized some songs, he made up about 20 songs in 30 minutes. It was brilliant.

I'm not sure if my future children will ever know my father, but they will definitely know the fables and myths that surround his existence.

The Color Brown

As an artist I love colors. I love everything about them.  All of God's beauty can be found in a simple rainbow. I have taken on an internship with my sister as an assistant photographer for weddings. Most of my sister's clients are Indian, therefore most of the weddings are Indian weddings.  As you already know Aiya, Indian weddings are the most beautiful spectacle of colors. Red lehnghas, orange marigolds, blue saris, white dhothis, saffron colored sweets, it's just amazing.  Interlaced in all the brilliance is the color that God chose for the Indian race... the color brown. I think the color brown could possibly be the most hated color in India. I recently read an article about how the Indian population spends billions of dollars a year on complexion lightening creams. I wonder about this phenomenon. 

In my household my father focused so hard on education with his children we never heard about our skin color. The first time I realized I had dark skin was when someone pointed it out (Gujarati guy in college). It was never a point of concern for me. As a mature adult I see how thoroughly skin color matters in the Indian community. Matrimonial ads list education, profession, height, and skin color. Why does it matter so much?

I wonder if the whole issue began with the British rule in India. It is being propagated by Bollywood. The fair skinned, light eyed actresses are role models for beauty in a country where 100's of million of people are dark skinned, brown eyed.  I'm just confused by the whole topic.

In retrospect Americans spend billions of dollars a year on tanning creams, so maybe it's just about not being satisfied with what you have...