Blood, Sweat, and Tears

They say money is the root to all evil. I think money is one of the few material things that all people collectively around the world understand. They understand what it can buy, how it can redefine comfort, establish a sense of security and mostly the need for it. We all need a certain amount of money to survive, we all want more than we need.

My father worked really hard for his money. I remember growing up, watching him work. He never missed a day of work, was always willing to travel, and switched jobs any chance he had for a salary increase. He had seven children, and he understood the responsibility that went along with feeding and housing his family. Over the years he invested and bought property and made sure his family was safe with assets. Towards the end of his mental breakdown we noticed his homes had many backed up payments. We've recently been forced to sell his first home he had ever bought. The home is in New Jersey and too far away to upkeep.

In the selling process I was reminded of the book, "The Good Earth." I felt we weren't just selling a property, we were selling a part of my father's life. This house was the first house he bought in the states, four of his children were born in this house. My mother didn't approve of us selling the property, she thought we should keep it for it's sentimental value. We had to sell the house to preserve his other investments. I will never understand the "amount" of work my father did to make it to America.

His village Kamalpur has haunted my dreams since going there this past year. I can't imagine the will power it must have taken to decide to go against his parents and get an education. My father always told us stories of how hard he worked. In Calcutta he worked as a coolie at Howrah station, a tutor to highschool students, any odd job he could find, but he never forgot his final goal to get a college education. His life spiraled in directions that I'm not sure he had planned. As his children we are just trying to make sure both of my parents are well taken care of and not lose his legacy... it's a delicate balance.

On Bright Lights & Fairies

Aiya, I'm currently in Tennessee spending sometime with my sister and her family. I've taken a long generous break for the past couple of months. I had no idea how much time I spent at work, until I stopped working. You spend time getting up to go to work, then the eight to nine hours at work, then going home from work, then more time just thinking about work. I think the average American spends twelve hours a day "at work." And just like that, all that work is done, and the lights go out. All the work that was put into your job is used by others, and you are very quickly forgotten. I'm ready to move on. This break has helped...

Much of my time in Tennessee has been spent with my newborn niece. Children are the brightest of lights. There is such wonder in their eyes, I love to look at familiar things through the eyes of a child. Everything is amazing from that vantage point. The most common place things are mind blowing to my niece. She just learned how to sit on her own, and her current fascinations include ceiling fans, the buttons on my shirt, my hair, and books.

There's a lot more open space in Tennessee compared to California. So much of the land is undeveloped. The area around my sister's home is a forest full of large beautiful trees. The summer out here is closer to India's summers: hot and humid. I don't get a chance to go out much in the day, but in the evenings I try to go for walks through the forest. The whole forest bursts with life in the evenings: birds chirping, crickets singing, the rhythmic humming of the wind through the trees.

This past week as I walked through the forest I noticed little bursts of bright light. They are lightening bugs... little flying insects that light up for brief moments in flight. Pure magic. I'd always read about them growing up, but I had never seen them before last week. My first instinct was to run and catch one, and I attempted many times, each time before I could close my hands around the little fairies, their light would go out, and they would disappear. Escaping from my grasp, and on to a new flight. I'm not sure how many "lights" a lightening bug has, but for their brief moment they are very bright... and they light up the area and the things that surround them.